36-year-old boyfriend insists he and his girlfriend share a room with dude she's never met on Vegas tip, won't allow her to buy her own room: 'I would rather you cancel your reservations if you don't want to do Vegas the way I want you to'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Apr 14, 2025 10:00 PM EDT

Sharing a room with someone on vacation is not always easy. Sure, you might make sacrifices so you and your pals can go on a trip together, but you're probably going to be picky about who that is. You're sharing a bathroom with them, a space with them, and sleeping in the same room. That's pretty intimate, especially once you get to a certain age and you're not quite in the summer camp spirit anymore. If I'm paying for a vacation and using my own time off, then I want it to be comfortable. Or else it's just not worth my time.

That's exactly how one woman felt, then quickly realized that her boyfriend wasn't going to let that happen. His plan for the trip looked a little bit different. Not to mention, they're a long-distance couple, so the time they spend together is limited anyways. But that didn't stop him from neglecting to account for their feelings.

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  • 01
    LA AS
    via David Lusvardi

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • So when she reached out for advice from the internet, they came back with some questions about the foundation of her relationship. Some pointed out his controlling streak while others pointed out his lack of consideration for her comfort and safety. Read on for the story and see what you think.

  • 02

    AITA: BF invited me to Vegas, only to find out a week prior that his friend will be sleeping in our same room

    My boyfriend (36M) is going to a darts tournament in Las Vegas, he invited me (35F) to come with. First thing to know, it's a long distance relationship and we don't see each other very often, 2-3 times per year.
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 03
    The first thing he tells me, a caveat, his room came with a darts tournament bundle thing and it's a smoking room and he plans on smoking lots of hookah. It's also just a regular low-end room, like no chairs or anything. I'm like "I'd pay for an upgrade, but if you're really set on it, then fine." So a week passes and I'm wondering
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 04
    about how I'm gonna get there, and he says he'll buy the plane ticket. There's one inexpensive one, but it's a really late flight. The rest are like $300-400 more, so I'm like ahhh ok fine let's do the late flight one (And in my head, I'm just annoyed. I hate late planning because that usually means more expensive, and crappier travel). So
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 05
    then he's like setting up the flight, and he goes "oh btw [his best friend]'s brother is going to be staying in the room with us." I'm stunned and say "...you're joking right?" And he says no. I go "I have never met this guy in my entire life, and now you're telling me I'm about to share a room with him?" He's like "what does it matter, I'll be there." I'm like "I'm not a man,
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 06
    I'm not in the Army [context: BF is an Army Soldier], it is not normal for me to suddenly share a room with a man I've never met, I want my privacy." He thinks I'm overreacting and I'm stressing him out over a "small detail." I'm like "it's not small detail?? This is a human being whom I've never met that I'll be all of a sudden sleeping in the same room with?!" And then he starts getting upset that I'm ruining his own vacation plans.
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 07
    So I tell him "buy him his own room." Him - "out of the question." Me- "why won't he stay with [BF's best friend]?" Him - "[BF's best friend] is already staying with someone."
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 08
    Me- "let me book my own room then" Him- "I can't agree to that, it's a waste of money." Me- "it's a waste of money for my own. comfort?" Him - silent I start trying to make my case, like yo, this is not cool, and I'm not being unreasonable. Ask any woman out there, this is not really okay.
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 09
    And he's like "I get you might be uncomfortable, but now I feel like I WILL be uncomfortable knowing you're uncomfortable, so maybe I need to rethink this." And he holds off on setting up any travel plans.
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 10
    And that is what really sets me off. So I booked my own flight with my own room (with my own money), and he is so upset about the wasted money and the fact that I disrespected his wishes, he is telling me to visit Vegas by myself. A few days go by and I try to talk to him again about it. I told him I
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 11
    can compromise on getting a less expensive room, but he told me there is no compromise for him. He said "I would rather you cancel your reservations if you don't want to do vegas the way I want you to." So that's where I'm at now. Canceling my reservations. AITA?
    via u/Dread_SheWolf
  • 12
    Cheezburger Image 10493762816
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 13

    Commenters had a lot to say about the state of her relationship.

    shontsu 10h ago • He's upset about the wasted money, when its your money that you happily spent yourself in order to feel comfortable on this trip? Um... He said "I would rather you cancel your reservations if you don't want to do vegas the way I want you to."
    via u/shontsu
  • 14
    You get how concerning a statement like that is. Do you really want a relationship with someone who insists that you need to do things his way or not at all? NTA, but you really should take some quiet time to think about this relationship.
    via u/shontsu
  • 15
    haleorshine 9h ago . That statement is hella shady - he's basically saying the way he wants her to do Vegas is by sleeping in a room with a stranger... That's weird. Like, if he was just broke and that's what the problem is, why would he be telling her this isn't the way he wants her to do Vegas.
    via u/haleorshine
  • 16
    I'm dramatically overreacting in my head, but I was just listening to a podcast about the Pelicot trial and so I'm like "Do not stay in a room where your long-distance boyfriend is insisting the only way you go to Vegas is to sleep in the same room as a stranger and he gets upset that you are spending your own money not to share a room with a stranger!" I mean, cancel your plans to go to Vegas. anyway, and see how he addresses this issue in the future, but he's acting pretty shady by my books.
    via u/haleorshine
  • 17
    Illo|||||||||| 9h ago • Can't believe you're actually going and you booked your own sh... When he insisted on friend staying w him the right response was, "Ok, enjoy the trip with your friend, I will not be joining because this doesn't sound like a pleasant experience for me."
    via u/Illo||||||||||
  • 18
    If this dude doesn't want to see you, then you shouldn't be wasting time, money, or emotions on him. If he wants to see you he can prioritize you. You're accepting sh treatment
    via u/Illo||||||||||
  • 19
    WaterWitch009 · 10h ago . "I would rather you cancel your reservations if you don't want to do vegas the way I want you to." Babe. This is not someone you want to be with.
    via u/WaterWitch009
  • 20
    cressidacole 10h ago . Why is he so determined that the three of you be in a basic hotel room together? What is he planning?
    via u/cressidacole
  • 21
    InfamousCup7097 · 9h ago Your bf doesn't like you. You should probably let that actually process. He does not want to spend alone time with you even though he rarely sees you. He's not your bf he's not even a friend. Stop wasting your time and money on this.
    via u/InfamousCup7097
  • 22
    Elegant Bluebird_... • 10h ago NTA. This man is showing you who he is, believe it. He cares more about his own wishes than your comfort. He doesn't show you any real regard frankly. I'd be done with him all together.
    via u/Elegant_Bluebird_460
  • 23
    • Cherryncosmo 10h ago NTA The fact that you even considered comprising getting a cheaper room, shows how much control he wants or has over you. Dude is upset you spent your own money? Pfft. What a ....! Childlike behavior at his big age. Is this someone you see having a future with?
    via u/Cherryncosmo
  • 24
    Wooden_Opportuni... 9h ago NTA. Look at all the warning signs/red flags he's showing you. He told you not asked you about another guy sharing a bedroom, an intimate private space. It's "out of the question" for this other guy to get his own
    via u/Wooden_Opportunity65
  • 25
    room. Your BF clearly doesn't give a about your comfort, privacy or dignity. He doesn't want you to get your own room despite you paying for it with your own money. Why? Has he promised his friend a threese? A woman on her own in a bedroom with two
    via u/Wooden_Opportunity65
  • 26
    guys - you shouldn't need anyone to spell this out for you. And if you agree to sharing a bedroom with these two guys then it may give the wrong impression about any expectations. And finally, if you don't want to do Vegas the way he wants you to he'd rather you cancelled. Honey you need to do this, cancel everything, and cancel him too.
    via u/Wooden_Opportunity65
  • 27
    LetsGetsThisPartyOn • 9h ago Cancel your reservation! Get a new boyfriend. Ant boyfriend who sees a partner 2-3 times a year and doesn't care that someone else is in your room the entire time you see each other for one of those times is sooooo not into you!!!
    via u/LetsGetsThisPartyOn
  • 28
    shoxford 10h ago Nta, are you into darts and smoking as well? It doesn't sound like he's considered you at all. I wouldn't want to share with a random guy either. I'd be rethinking the relationship if I were you.
    via u/shoxford
  • 29
    . CoupleofDoms · 9h ago Sounds like a nightmare situation. Why are you actively choosing to be in a relationship with someone who treats you like this and who you only see 2-3x a year? He has no respect for you.
    via u/CoupleofDoms
  • 30
    myunqusrnm . 9h ago nta. More importantly, do NOT go to Vegas. he's weird and inconsiderate- at best. AT BEST. this is a strange af hill to di on, but let him di on it. be cautious.
    via u/myunqusrnm

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